Dealing With Approach Anxiety

When I teach workshops I talk about many ways to deal with approach anxiety. Here are 10 quick tips on how to stop approach anxiety.

1. Act Like It’s A Game – When an interaction is over, just hit the reset button, and try again. You learn and get further in the game each time you hit that reset button. A game should be fun, not emotionally weighed down. Your out there to have fun, and other people’s reactions are unimportant.
2. Remove The Outcome – For some it helps to remove the outcome. By this I mean that they initially (while learning) should have only one goal, and that is to enjoyably learn from the interaction. Others may want to keep their eye on the ball by challenging themselves to get further, such as by setting a desired outcome in their mind before opening. That might be to bounce the girl to another venue, or to simply initiate some sort of touch during the conversation. Read more

Playing Dog With God

What follows is just some curiosity, and thoughts that I have in my head. My conversational topics usually start with such a foundation. Do you want to know what to start a conversation with? Do you want to know what to talk about? ..and do you want to know this without using canned “material” from someone else’s contrived repertoire?

Yes, then here’s an example. It’s just current things I’ve experienced, or seen this past week, and therefore I’m talking about it with people. Is it high octane high energy opening material for a loud night club? Not in and of itself, but if your personal energy is at the right level, and you interact with people in a captivating way using such things as; teasing, social control, and describing your thoughts or stories with passion in an animated manner, then yes it can be. Delivery is everything! This type of casual conversation is also ideal for day time settings.

If you are stuck for an opener, and a conversation right now, then by all means try this out verbatim as an example. Note though that it’s untested and unrefined, as I was just thinking about this today. I have no real world responses to encourage you with this time. From past experience though I’m sure it will be fine. Women love talking about Read more

Direct Opener By A Natural

“Picking Up A Younger Woman While She’s Driving.”

I was exchanging stories with a friend recently on the topic of how we met some of our girlfriends. If I could bottle my friend’s attitude and sell that to you I would definitely make a fortune. He is what most people would call a “natural,” as in he’s a natural with women. Just having lunch with him the other day he couldn’t help himself flirt casually with the sexiest woman that walked in.

He wasn’t distracted from the conversation. I didn’t feel like he was mentally in another place. You know when you are trying to talk with someone and they are obviously not present. He just intuitively made a comment to her as she walked past us to the counter. She smiled back, and he picked it up again as she was leaving. It’s this kind of natural and casual ease that I try to instill in my students. Read more

Cool Party Trick.. Go Criss Angel On Her Ass!

Parties are great places to meet women. If you or your friend are the host then you are socially proofed, which works to your immediate advantage, and if not then you can raid the fridge. House parties should cultivate a more relaxed and uninhibited vibe than a club. It’s fun to mix a girl a drink, or get her to mix you one.

People love party tricks. Perhaps you’ve been to a party where someone’s party trick is so much fun that it contagiously spreads until everyone is doing it.. kind of like my ex-girlfriend Lisa.. haha just kidding.. no but seriously if you get the chance you should totally do Lisa!

At some point in your life you must have been at a party where no one could find a bottle opener, which sucks. Nah.. it’s an opportunity! You get the chance to show the girls just how ingenious you can be. Counter tops and table edges are always an option. Give onlooking women a spike of bad boy danger-attraction when you butt the edge of the bottle cap against a table, and proceed to slam your hand down on top of it. WHAM!

Though sometimes you get wood chips in your beer, or worse still mark the table. You are so money doing this though, and women love it so who cares. You’ll drink those splinters and not complain. I always preferred to use a key to prise the top off, which curiously makes me look nerdier than I already am.

So gentlemen, I present to you the ultimate.. the best.. the coolest way to open those beer bottles in front of your doe-eyed prey. For want of a better term.. drum roll please.. I present to you, “The Read more

I Need Your Fucking Opinion? ..Come On!

Warning: The views, opinions and potty mouthed language expressed by the author in this article is fully supported by the website owner. In fact the website owner shares these views, because we are actually the same person. If cuss words offend you kindly skip the first sentence.. and try NOT to read those big capitalised words, ok?

FUCK..FUCK..FUCK..FUCK..FUCKING..FUCK!! Please for sanity’s sake stop once and for all from using blatantly stock material, especially when it was broadcast to millions on national television. Using an Opinion Opener, or more accurately a False Opinion Opener is a fine and marvellous concept, but there are more, and better ways to start conversations with it than simply saying, “Hey guy’s I need a female opinion…” From now on this shall be referred to as the Taboo Words.

First let us take a journey into the past. That’s right we’re going on a little adventure so strap yourselves in, and introduce yourself to the person in the seat next to you. There are unfortunately no emergency exits, for that you might want to check out Neil Strauss’ new book, “Emergency,” according to him it might just save your life.

Speaking of Neil, as far as I know he coined the term “false opinion,” shortly after adopting Mystery’s method of using opinion openers to start conversations. The idea is that most people are more than happy to start talking about their opinions, especially women Read more

The “I’m an Expert” Opener

Tonight I was driving past a Blockbuster video store, when I saw a cute blond girl through the window staring at a rack of videos. Of course I had no intention of renting a video so I drove home right? Of course NOT.. I pulled up, went inside, sauntered next to the girl, and the conversation went something like this..

(I stand next to her and give her my mischievous smile)

jdog: “Can I help you?” (she looks at me.. I smile)

girl: “Oh.. you work here?”

jdog: “no.. I’m an expert!” (I nod) Read more