You meet a girl you really like… she’s attracted to you… You start to hit it off, and it’s certain you’ll be seeing her again.

Awesome!

Now what do you do?

Here’s the thing… most guys are so focused on just getting the date, they don’t bother to learn anything about how to give a woman pleasure, or how to be a masterful lover.

And I’m not just talking about rapport or vibing or what to do on a 2nd date… I’m talking about creating a powerful, exciting sexual relationship with a woman.

I’m talking wild-screaming orgasms and rip-up the sheets wake the neighbors sex.

Let’s not kid ourselves here… Men want to be with women because we want to enjoy wild-sexy-fun with them.

But here’s something most guys don’t understand, or don’t believe…

WOMEN WANT HOT SEX!

And I’ve got news for you, women WANT it too. In fact, they want it even more than you.

But they have been trained by society to never act on these desires because they will be labeled a slut.

You have to know women want sex and know it’s your job to get her to open up and let her wild sexual side come out to play.

BE THE LOVER SHE NEVER FORGETS

There is one man who has made it his life’s work to teach men and couples how to have wildly exciting relationships. His name is David Shade, and he shows men the secrets of how to be the kind of lover women NEVER forget.

His methods are lethally effective. In fact, he warns men to be sure and ‘choose wisely’ because the women will become ADDICTED to the pleasure you give them.

He has a new book out called:

“the Secrets of Female Sexuality:

I highly recommend you grab a copy, it’s a book all men should read.

And, I recommend you get it on Wednesday October 7, because David is having a special celebration for the new book.

Buy it on that day and you’ll get access to over $300 in bonus gifts from some of the top dating & relationships experts.

Also, if you buy it today, you’ll have a chance to win copies of David’s other products.

He will be picking winners every hour from 10 AM to 6 PM Eastern from those who buy the book and register for the bonuses.

Full details and a list of all the bonus goodies are here:

http://bit.ly/wsRA5

Sincerely,

Justin “JDOG” Marks

P.S. No matter how wild your fantasies are about women… David has done them in real life. Using his methods you can get your woman to do ANYTHING you desire in the bedroom.

P.P.S. The book is only $13.58 and you get over $300 worth of bonus goodies. It’s a helluva deal. But only on Wednesday October 7.

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1. How to get a woman to be very naughty with you

I’m going to tell you about why you should want to pay VERY close attention to a man who can teach you about how to give your women Incredible Pleasure.

The man is David Shade. He teaches men how to give women mind-blowing sexual experiences in the bedroom way beyond anything she has ever experienced with any other guy.

As David likes to say “You’ll ruin it for every other guy”.

But first, I need to warn you of 2 important things.

1. David’s methods only work for women you plan to see more than once or twice. This isn’t about one-night-stands.

2. You can create a stalker. This is not a joke. When women get a taste of this kind of PLEASURE, they become addicted to it. As David likes to say “Choose wisely”.

So, just what kind of ’secrets’ will you discover? Here’s one of my favorites. It’s a simple formula for a man to get anything he wants from a woman.

Are you ready? Here it is…

Focus on giving your woman pleasure, instead of ‘getting’ something from her. Make sure you know for a fact she’s having real honest to goodness knee-buckling multiple orgasms!

When you do this…

SHE WILL WANT TO RECIPROCATE!

She will go out of her way to make sure you are the happiest man on the planet. And likely in ways you hadn’t imagined possible.

Think about this for a second, and you’ll realize the power of it because 9 out of 10 of guys don’t do things this way.

Most guys are only interested in getting their own rocks off, so if a woman enjoys the sex… it’s pure luck for her.

When you focus on her sexual pleasure, you will INSTANTLY stand out as being different from every other guy she has ever met. She’ll think she’s won the best-guy-ever lottery. (and she will BRAG to her friends)

Then, when she’s open to new adventures with you… the sky’s the limit.

And another thing you’ll learn from David, women are WAY more naughty than men. Their dark fantasies would shock you.

But they will never be that naughty with you unless they feel safe with you and that starts with you focusing on their pleasure instead of ‘getting’ something from her.

Then David can show you how to get her to actually ACT on her fantasies (and yours).

Like I said… David is a man you want to know about. That’s why I recommend you get his new book, the Secrets of Female Sexuality.

Book Release Celebration with Bonuses and Giveaways!

To celebrate the release of his new book, and to make sure it gets ranked well on Amazon… David has put together some killer bonuses from his friends who are experts in dating & relationships.

Everything from books to coaching calls, with a value north of $300.

Also, every hour from 10AM to 6PM Eastern Time, David will be giving away a copy of his “Select Women Wisely” program, a $147 value.

But, only if you buy his book on Wednesday Oct 7, 2009 and register for the bonuses.

You can see all the bonuses, and find out full details about how it works at the URL below.

http://bit.ly/wsRA5

Bluntly, this is essential reading for any man who really loves women. You should own it and read it cover-to-cover. The fact that you get over $300 bonuses when you buy a $13.58 book is like icing on the cake.

Cheers.. Justin “JDOG”

P.S. You must buy the book AND register for the bonuses on the same day, Wednesday October 7. (The earlier in the day you do it, the more chances you have for the giveaways.

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1. Be the best lover she’s ever had

It’s all too easy to pick fault with ourselves, whether that’s by second guessing our decisions, or by dwelling on our insecurities. I’ve been writing lately about various aspects of Inner Game, from dealing with Approach Anxiety to pushing through the discomfort of rejection.

On a similar track my mind was day dreaming today about a certain woman. Pondering the beauty of a woman is an all too easy pass time for me. From the soft lines of her face, to the allure of her eyes.. her full lips that I can’t stop thinking about.. I kept glancing at them when she was talking to me. Her smooth skin.. the curves of her body. Deep breath…….aaaannd continue.. In fact if we didn’t have to talk to each other I could happily have a conversation in my own head while gazing at a woman’s beauty.. hmm and I could quite easily do that right now, so before I completely lose my train of thought here.. What does she see in me? What can she see in me? Does she have to like my physical looks? Can she feel these types of feelings towards any aspect of me? ..and perhaps most importantly.. Do I like me?

What is there about me that she can find beautiful in some way, if I were to look through her eyes, and listen through her ears? This doesn’t have to be about physical looks either. However, I am of the opinion that once you start connecting with someone, you do start to change the way you see them to some extent. Your perception of their beauty actually changes. If you really connect then they appear more attractive to you overall, and you feel more comfortable in their company. On the flip side, when someone’s personality is off in some way, or they fundamentally conflict with your core values, then you may perceive that person as less attractive. Can you think of times in your own life when either of these were true? Take a moment to think about this, before you continue to follow along with what I’m saying.

I find that when you’re emotions are in sync with those of another, as Daniel Goleman describes “synchrony,” that person becomes more attractive in your mind. From my experience this is also true when you had initially found that person to be unattractive. Have you ever heard someone speaking about a date they went on? “We didn’t really connect,” Susan said in a negative tone, her facial expression reflecting her feelings. One would sense she found him unattractive, but the picture she showed was of a guy with model good looks. Upon further discussion she did indeed find him unattractive. His personality, and the things he spoke about made her feel the emotions she associates with someone who is not physically attractive to her. I’m always curious when one of my girl-friends goes on a date, to find out what she was drawn to, or what made her find the guy undesirable.

Finding someone more, or less attractive when in synchrony doesn’t have to be from a sexual perspective either. You might start to appreciate the attractive qualities of someone of the same sex as you. Similarly, it may be a much older person whom you picture as a grandparent figure. Perhaps the bags under someone’s eyes start to reflect their depth of character in a charming way. Or maybe you become aware that their eyes themselves possess a certain quality that is quite beautiful. When they smile you find yourself smiling, filled with warm emotions, while noticing a playful glint in their eye for the first time. Isn’t this attractive? Opening up your awareness to appreciate the beauty in others, is a wonderful mechanism for opening up your appreciation of your own attractive qualities.

There is something to be learned from my friends who practice yoga, when they greet each other by saying Namaste – “The light within me honors the light within you.”

A fitting variation may be:
“The beauty of me admires the beauty of you.”

Opening up your awareness also involves being able to listen and accept the compliments that you receive. Doubly so for repeated compliments from women. If more than one person has told you something to the effect that; your smile is charming, or that you are intelligent, fun to be around, you make the person feel comfortable being around you, or any other quality of yours is particular attractive, then believe it! Even if at first you don’t think that it’s actually true. Realize that from someone else’s point of view it very well might be.

A man I very much admire once said to me, ” Take a good look at yourself in the mirror. If you don’t like the person staring back at you every day, then you better find a way to like that person. You’re going to be seeing him for a really long time.”

If someone were to ask you what your favorite attribute is about yourself, do you have an answer?

1. I think my eyes are attractive. I don’t get instant compliments about them, and for a brief time I even wore colored contacts to cover them up. When a girlfriend is in my arms during an intimate moment, while we are gazing into each others eyes, then in that moment I often hear how beautiful my eyes are.
2. I know that I’m a great conversationalist, granted I’ve made a conscious effort to improve my communication skills. I do get compliments about this on a regular basis. Would this make you appear more attractive to a woman? Absolutely!
3. I know that people instantly feel comfortable around me. I’ve heard this countless times from women, and also from students when teaching workshops.

There I gave you three personal examples. Only one was a physical attribute, and objectively compared to people with absolutely stunning eyes, mine are just average. I find them a beautiful part of me non the less.

May the beauty in others admire the beauty in you.
May you find the beauty in yourself, and in others.

~ Justin

Related posts:

1. Interesting Video On Being Beautiful
2. Having Leverage On Yourself
3. Self Esteem & Sexual Communication

What are your thoughts about this video? Post your comments below!

I have a question for you. How well do you truly understand women? More specifically, do you have any idea what it’s really like to be a very beautiful woman? How does she feel inside from being stared at wherever she goes?

Does she get tired of being hit on constantly, but at other times find herself seeking the validation she is so used to? What are her frustrations, anxieties, and difficulties that arise just because she is more attractive? Or is her life perfect 100% of the time, because let’s face it most guys will do anything for her, right?

Unless you have dated a few desirable women then I would think that you wouldn’t really understand the reality of what it’s like to be a woman of particular beauty. If you have studied the female mind, and enough seduction related materials then perhaps you have started to get some insight, but without spending a lot of time around beautiful women, either as a platonic friend (by your own choice,) or through dating, then it’s difficult to have a deep understanding.

I remember several years ago seeing part of a Dr. Phil show, where a stunningly beautiful women, who seemed on the surface to have an idyllic life, just completely broke down on camera. I didn’t get it at the time. I didn’t get that her life could be anything other than perfect. Most people find it difficult to relate to the problems that come alongside beauty. Much in the same way that beautiful women have no concept as to what it’s like being an average, or less than average looking guy. She has no frame of reference. She doesn’t need one though, as she’s not trying to get with the average guy.

Attractive women may get what they want a lot of the time, and they might get treated better than most, but there is a flip side. She has to screen through mountains of men who fake kindness and sincerity, to find the ones who are genuine. Does she find that she frequently gets played by the high valued men in her life? She may find it constantly more difficult in the work place, and not because of men, but because other women are jealous of her looks, and therefore make her life difficult. There may be an emotional separation between her and her best girlfriend. She always gets the attention from guys, who directly hit on her, while treating her girlfriend like chopped liver. This causes difficulties, and is one of the reasons why we say to open the friend first. Win the friends over before focusing your attention on the hottest girl in the group. Realize that there are a myriad other difficulties attractive women face.

Is she brushing you off because she dislikes you personally? Or is she tired of having 12 guys hit on her today with lame approaches, and no obvious regard for her as a person? Perhaps she just needs to make the best use of her time, and has programmed herself to shut down certain advances form ANY guy. Think twice before calling her a bitch.

Understanding her reality will skyrocket your chances of getting further with her. When women feel that you understand their world they will instantly be set at ease, and they will want to connect with you. It is the rarity. It was my good friend Ross Jeffries who first shared this concept with me. Ross calls it “Being An Authority On Her World.” If conveys so many positives about you. She will think, “wow, this guy really gets me!” She will know that you must have dated a lot of beautiful women, therefore there is unstated preselection being conveyed. For you Mystery Method guys out there that would be a DHV (Displaying Higher Value,) while hitting one of the primary attraction switches.

Granted it’s a catch 22, because in order to raise your chances of dating beautiful women it helps considerably to have previously dated other beautiful women. So what can you do about it? Choose to develop platonic friendships with such women for starters. Take an interest in the female mind.

I did find one guy’s video response to the Sundance clip on youtube, sorry I couldn’t embed the video as embedding was disabled according to the author’s settings. If you’re interested in another guy’s thoughts on this then click the HERE.

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I was having an interesting chat with one of my wings recently. He said that I was unusual in the way that I stuck with learning, and practicing even when I wasn’t getting the results that I wanted. He said that from his time in the community most guys will get disillusioned and quit. He put it stronger by saying that most guys just can’t deal with getting emotionally pummeled on a regular basis from all of the rejections. So they quit before ever getting to the point where they actually start to “get it”, and they never really see consistent positive results.

So I described to him my motivation to keep going. It wasn’t a strong desire to have sex with swimsuit models, although who wouldn’t want that. Yes, wanting hotter women was a factor, but not the factor which kept me going. My emotional leverage was actually comprised almost entirely of negative feelings. I was so completely miserable that I didn’t want to live the rest of my life that way.

For a long time I came off creepy using too much NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming.) I used a lot of canned game, peacocked far too much a lot of the time, and eventually I did start seeing some good responses, but It took me a long time before those smiles, and laughs turned into me actually dating or sleeping with the girls that I was meeting.

I had to recognize the little victories, such as; disarming the AMOG, or getting a girl to laugh or listen to me longer than normal. I also had to shut out the pummeling from my mind, and had to stay focused on what was working, and what I was learning from each interaction. I kept a journal, and would often be seen vigorously writing in my moleskin about the girl I just met.

• What we spoke about.
• What I did right
• Which language patterns did I use
• She was totally into me when I did the trust test
• What I could have done better and can improve upon next time. NOT what I did WRONG!
• and so on

There were times, perhaps after a few months of thinking positively, where I would get disillusioned myself. Thinking such things as, “It doesn’t work.. yeah girls like me socially as a friend, but they are still not sexually attracted to me.. it works for some guys because they are better looking!” Then I would want to quit. I would start thinking negatively about my self image again. Aarrrgh.. I wanted to scream!

So what stopped me from giving up? I had such strong emotional leverage that I wouldn’t allow myself to stop trying. I didn’t want to go back to feeling completely shitty about myself. So I forced negative thoughts to the back of my mind.. forced a smile, and kept chipping away at it. I had ups and downs.

Over the years I’ve had this conversation with many friends who have far more life experience than I do, about the concept of emotional growth through pain. Anyone who has been through difficult times, and recovered from it will most likely agree that there is some merit to the phrase, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

Granted my motivational strategy was to the most part moving away from a place of strong emotional pain. Anthony Robbins, Richard Bandler, and others in NLP circles suggest that a healthier motivational strategy would be comprised of moving away from the place of pain, and moving towards a place of happiness or pleasure. Bandler, I believe coined the term a propulsion system to describe this.

Their theory is that if you only move away from pain then you may fall into the trap of wanting to replace it so badly that you don’t take the time to define where you actually want to be. Which can lead to landing in another painful situation, and therefore just bouncing around life that way. Of course they were talking in more general terms of goal getting, and making positive life changes.

Another key component of staying on track was creating a healthy Review Process. What I mean by this is that you have a choice when learning. You can either replay all the things that went wrong, and loop through all the embarrassing things you did in the interaction.. or you can externalize the review process and replay it like you are analytically watching an educational story in your mind. Rewarding yourself for the things that you did right no matter how small, and noticing where you can improve next time.

To summarize the two points that I’m making in this article:

1. Find your way to have strong emotional leverage on yourself. Whether that’s moving away from pain, moving towards pleasure, or a combination thereof. One book which helps people create this for getting into the best physical shape is, Body for Life: 12 Weeks to Mental and Physical Strength by Bill Phillips. I would say that 80% of the book is purely to help the reader create a strong motivational strategy to help them stick with the program. The system itself is solid advice on exercise, and eating right. It works but it’s nothing new, just sound practice taken from successful bodybuilders in the 80’s. By the time you get to the actual fitness program, having done your part during the motivational strategy primer, you are far more likely to reap the rewards from sticking with it.
2. Adopt a Healthy Review Process. This will help to minimize negative self talk, and help to stop you from reinforcing negative beliefs. Do this right and you will actually start to create positive reinforcement for yourself.

To learn anything to a good level it often takes years. It’s a fundamental principle of existence that to achieve anything of real value in life you have to be willing to put in the effort, and really work at it. You also have to be prepared to fail… a lot! The most successful people have a different viewpoint of failure, they call it learning how to be successful. Hmm.. I wonder if such people have already adopted a healthy review process?

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I have a strange curiosity.. no, not about soccer moms.. I know they can be cute.. nope, more fascinated by Twitter Moms

From reading their blog yesterday I discovered that smoking a doobie to relax is a common pass time for soccer mumsies, whether it’s legal medicinal or bought from a dealer New Jack City style!

Perhaps you don’t find this all that shocking? For all I know you’re sitting there nodding.. knowingly. Either way.. is Twitter Moms just for mothers, or could it possibly be a place to cruise for some hot milf action? Perhaps it is, and more liberally minded ones at that.

Do I really know if there are hoards of single mothers on there.. no.. lol.. but I did like the movie About A Boy, where he discovered the joys of dating single moms. Memorable quote, “I am an island. I am bloody Ibiza!”

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If you haven’t already heard, “Dating In The Dark” is a new reality dating show, where couples meet and go on dates in complete lights out darkness. Made possible with some very nifty infra-red video cameras. On the surface it seems like an idea with some great potential, and while it can be thought provoking at times it falls short of anything more than a dull and superficial social experiment. In a nutshell Dating In The Dark can pretty much stay in the dark, as it fails to shed any new light on what role looks play at the beginning of relationships.

Episode 1 recap

Three guys, and three gals move into a house and get paired up with each other. They generally make out, and have as much of a ‘date’ as they can in a sparse pitch black room before they actually see their partner for the first time. Interspersed with all this they go off and discuss what happened with their house mates.

Upon seeing their match they go back and either brag, or complain about their physical looks, before going on a final and normal day date if they decide to give it a shot. Who will stay together, and who will not.. I’m riveted.. ok not really. Whoever thought up this idea certainly knows how to cash in on a cheaply produced show, and for that I give big props.

I did like one sound bite from episode 2, where one of the girls reported that her date made her feel so comfortable.. “..being on my date with him was very comfortable, and being able to feel that on a first date is very important..” or words to that effect. This is the one and rare golden nugget of the show.

Here’s a quick preview of the show:

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I once read how subconscious processes take place while kissing, such that you are in a sense testing for biological compatibility. People who don’t like the taste of a potential mate will often screen that person out, even when they are otherwise attracted to them.

Kissing allows prospective mates to smell and taste each other’s pheromones for biological compatibility. Women are subconsciously more attracted to men whose major histocompatibility complex portion of their genome is different from their own, leading to offspring with resistance to a greater number of diseases due to heterosis, and thus having a better chance of survival. ~ except from Wikipedia

Years ago I heard a canned qualification routine about how kissing is important, and if a girl is not a good kisser then I don’t care how beautiful she is, it’s just not going to work out.. it’s a deal breaker! You would bring up such a subject after she gives you some IOI’s (Indicators Of Interest,) prior to conveying interest in her. Then you can progress happily into comfort, and kissing, etc. In the routine the guy then goes on to quiz the girl on if she is a good kisser.. challenges her.. kisses her.. and then tells her she’s average, or a solid 4 out of 10 or something. This teasing statement on the end dissipates any awkwardness, and helps maintain sexual tension. She may argue that she’s a good kisser, and you can say, ok maybe 6 or 7 out of 10 at a stretch.. hmm perhaps we just need more practice. Yes, it’s a fun little routine, and I admit to using it quite successfully.

You will find that the the more sexual choice you have, the more selective you become. This is true for both men and women. When a girl is a less than adequate kisser I’m not interested. I’m not going to give her kissing lessons.. I just lose interest. What really turns me right off though is when a girl has poor oral hygiene, tastes bad, has bad breath, or doesn’t floss!

I love.. love.. love thin and toned women.. BUT unfortunately we live in a time when it seems like every girl I meet has an eating disorder. Once you do a little googling on the subject it can be shocking to find message boards where thousands of women encourage each other to not eat, and to purge! Don’t even get me started on youtube’s thinspiration community. Hey ladies get a clue.. I’ve dumped a few girls because kissing them tasted so bad. Here’s a quote on what women think about the subject of kissing.

The other day I was walking with a friend and we got on the topic of men and their flossing habits. I asked her if it was wrong that I would stop considering a potential guy if he didn’t floss or wasn’t willing to start flossing.

I told her that non-flossing is a deal-breaker for me. It seemed so severe, so I was shocked that she actually agreed with me! This doesn’t mean we are high-maintenance, overly picky girls.

We just happen to love kissing men and insist that the recipient of our kisses provide a hygienic welcome. Personally, I don’t care if a man has a jacked-up grill. It’s how you take care of it, really. ~ from Dating Advice From a Girl

I admit it.. I AM fucking picky. Well guess what so are attractive women. So gentlemen, if you’re oral hygiene ain’t cutting it, perhaps it’s time to start putting as much emphasis into grooming, personal hygiene, and flossing, as you do on running openers.

Quite possibly all of the qualification routines out there will become true and real for you, once you reach the point where you are consistently dating the types of women you are attracted to. Until then you may have to fake it a little with the occasional story, test, challenge, routine.

So if Angelina Jolie greets you with a black tongue is she still a 10?

Don't mac on women with a black tongue!

A black, coated tongue is a temporary, harmless condition typically resulting from an overgrowth of bacteria and sometimes yeast in the mouth. These organisms accumulate on the tiny projections of the tongue — called papillae — and cause discoloration. Certain types of bacteria and yeast make red blood cell pigments (porphyrins), which can give the tongue a black appearance. In some cases, the tongue may also appear “hairy” due to more rapid growth of papillae or an interruption of the normal shedding of cells by the tongue.

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Meet women at work.. NOT like Al Bundy!

I answered a question on the forum, and thought that it would make an interesting article (skip forwards to the quote if you want.) It’s a fact that many of us have the opportunity to meet women while at work. Perhaps you are in the service sector, and attractive women are sometimes your customer. Or maybe you’re in a corporate office where there is a women that you’d like to meet. If you are holding yourself back in these situations then I’m guessing it’s not just due to a lack of flirtation skills, but also because of fears and concerns about what you think is acceptable behaviour in the work place.

In my corporate engineering career I often found myself in client offices with some absolutely beautiful women. I’m sure it comes as no surprise that they were rarely in the engineering department.. haha. At the time I had no idea how to approach them, I lacked confidence with women, and I also had all sorts of concerns floating around my head. I didn’t know if flirting or dating girls in the office would be frowned upon. I was worried about being accused of sexual harassment. I didn’t know what my boss or client supervisor would think. Looking back most of my concerns back then just seem laughable. It is possible however to make a stupid mistake in the workplace and then these can in fact become very real issues, so some discretion is important.

Here’s the kicker.. I had been working for a client out in california for several months, when I find out that one of my co-workers.. a friend of mine.. had actually slept with half the girls in the office. One was even married! At the time I was just flawed as I really wanted to ask a co-worker out but had no idea how to go about it, and he had probably already slept with her and moved on.

What follows is the dialogue between a chap on the forum, and myself about his work related situation: 

Reader’s Question:

I work at a mall, selling women’s shoes, yeah like al bundy, except in my case, beautiful young women come in on a daily basis. Everyone always says gee you must be getting a lot of numbers, but I’m not. Some of my coworkers are known for getting phone numbers easily, and i can’t seem to understand how they do it….some times i can see it in their eyes they’re interested, but i don’t know what to say, any tips?

thanks ahead of time..

JDOG’s Reply:

A close friend of mine sells ladies shoes for a living, and I’ve joked with him about having a foot fetish in an attempt for him to let me handle his customer’s feet..

Actually, the situation you are in applies to anyone who is in the service sector. I think there is a reservation that many guy’s have about overstepping boundaries, in addition to any lack of confidence that they may have with women. They don’t want to be reported if they miss-read a girl’s interest.

Here are my thoughts:

• It’s important to be well calibrated to avoid any complaints or awkwardness. Perhaps in your case you need to move out of your comfort zone (or as faro put it.. expand your comfort zone) in order to further develop your ability to sense where other people are emotionally at.
• Being confident, and a little flirtatious is generally good salesmanship anyway! (I’m going to hold back on making another be like the Zohan comment)
• Depending upon the atmosphere (and code of conduct) of where you work you can flirt more blatantly, or might need to be more subtle. Either way is fine.
• I get numbers from girls working in stores, and in the mall all the time, so if they can give me their number without worrying about their boss noticing then you should be able to also.
• HAVE A REASON – If you are flirting with each other, but logistically there is only so far you can progress things. No deeper level of comfort for example as she most likely needs to continue with her day, and you need to get back to work. Therefore, have a couple of pre-planned reasons for staying in touch that you can just pull out of your back pocket without much consideration. Such as:
  • Events that you help organise on the side, or otherwise do socially; fashion shows, clubs events, house parties, website blog, event mailing list, dinner party, cookout, WINE TASTINGS, band promotion.. etc..
  • Be direct – “you seem cool, but I have to go back to work, and I’m sure you’re busy also.. Obviously I don’t know you from a hole in the wall, but how do you suppose we continue this conversation another time?” She will usually offer her number or email or social networking link at this point. Occasionally she will say she is seeing someone, or not interested.
  • When you hand her receipt also ask her to put her number down for you.. be confident and give her a sexy smile (think James Bond.)
  • “I shouldn’t do this as I’m at work, but it’s rare that you meet someone in this town with a great outlook on life.. and hey I’m a rule breaker,” then just hand her a piece of paper and a pen. Or you could tell her about a party/event coming up (any bridge for that matter), and hand her a piece of paper and a pen.
  • You could have a reason to chat on myspace or facebook.. best to have a decent profile first. I use this option when I don’t have time to build comfort as I’m very socially proofed online. This might mean getting her email or myspace link. You can always tell her to write her number down also (almost as an after thought) when she is in the middle of writing her email down.

Spoon from season 1 of the pickup artist contacted me the other day. Many of you already know that after the show finished I spent a whole month in LA hanging out with the contestants from the show, and coaching some of them for free. I felt that the ones who really wanted to learn got a raw deal from being on the show. Reality television is generally not the place to fix yourself.

Anyway, Spoon is now spending some of his time selling jewellery, where he meets a constant flow of young beautiful women.. that lucky dog..haha.. well I have to tell you he is putting everything I taught him into action, and has sent me pictures of some of the gorgeous girls that he has met while working.

You can totally do this too!

One other time that stands out in my mind was when I was shopping for a pair of Fry boots at some department store. It was a big department store, and the men’s and ladies shoe section were joined together. A chap was helping me out. He was dressed smart in a suit, with a tie, but was more dressed up than he needed to be… and far more stylish than the other sales assistants.

He also was a great communicator, coming off as a fun guy, and good salesman.. not pushy. I decided not to buy the boots as they were $200 and I wanted to shop around. A week or 2 later I went back to buy them. They were available a little cheaper online, but not by much, and I didn’t want to wait for an order to arrive.

Now I could have gone to several other stores, but the salesman was very helpful, and I liked him so I went back and purchased them from him. One of my philosophies in life is that when money is so hard to earn why effectively pay for someone’s salary if you don’t particularly like them.. or said another way if you like a sales person then let them get the commission, right?

Ok.. so on my return visit I discovered one of the reasons why that chap stood out in the way he communicated, and in his personal style. Firstly, he was making more sales! Secondly, he was a player! Not a payer in the negative sense of the word.. but this guy obviously was good with the ladies.. I watched him pretty much run 2 sets of women, while waiting to buy my boots.

You said that you “could see it in their eyes” sometimes that they are interested in you. It rarely gets clearer than that. When you feel that connection, it’s like she’s holding up a giant billboard saying, “ASK ME OUT!” or “I LKE YOU!” so back to my rules of Day Game, when you get a strong IOI act on it. Even if you are a little nervous, and say something like, “look I don’t normally do this but you just have this wonderful vibe about you.. I don’t suppose you would be interested in some stimulating conversation over a coffee, would you?”

Be the zohan!

Reader’s Reply:

Wow, I don’t know what to say other than I will definitely ACT on the opportunities i get, next time. It’s amazing how you hit every single aspect of where I was coming from, like how i don’t want to cross any boundaries or anything. I will get out of my bubble and just do it next time i get a chance, look forward to a work field report haha. thanks a lot jdog!

My closing thoughts are that when unsure always ebb on the side of caution in the workplace, and please use your own discretion. During my corporate career I did hear about a couple of incidents where people had been internally investigated following a sexual harassment accusation. One of them was a guy who filed a complaint with the HR department against a lady in the office. In those two cases nothing serious came of it, but it still leaves me with concern for anyone who is completely socially un-calibrated running rampant with routines based game in an office environment.

No related posts.

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