ASKJDOG Datacenter Server

Months ago I decided it was time to move all my websites to a new state of the art server. With all my personal and client sites, this is a LOT of websites, and a big job.

Everything runs on content managers, and databases these days, so you don’t just copy the files, and re-upload them to the new server. There’s a lot of database work involved, especially to keep the sites current with the latest technologies.

So to cut a long story short I’m about half way through moving the sites. Recently I moved the old Arizona PUA Lair website, and gave it a revamp in the process. That was about a 40-50 hour process as there were some database issues.

My idea (for now) for http://ArizonaPUA.com is primarily the Discussion Forum for local Arizona guys to meet, but it in fact used by people all over the world, with almost 20,000 posts about dating, and pickup. The main website was actually the very first PUA Magazine styled website, and has been running since 2004. It was outdated, and difficult to navigate, so I gave it a fresh, albeit tabloidesque feel.

For ASKJDOG, I also want to modify it a little, but for right now I’m in the process of backing up, and transferring to the new server.

I just felt I should give all the regular readers an update as to why things have slowed down here lately.

I have also been taking on fewer and fewer coaching clients, while I refocus my career in Engineering. I love teaching and helping deserving men with their dating lives, but I also really miss using my brain for engineering in the corporate work environment.

All the best,
Justin.

Related posts:

1. Welcome To The New ASKJDOG Website

Occasionally my counterparts out there in the ‘Seduction Community’ create a product or eBook that I think you could really benefit from. Here’s a quick run down of some very promising items that you might consider taking a look at.

Featured Product: The Matchbook Method – Highly Recommended!

I’ve checked this guy out, and the material he has come up with really does work, but wait that’s not all, because this guy has actually tested it down to a science. It is really rather impressive how he shows you the various ways to optimize your Myspace, Facebook, or other social networking profiles to meet women. He has tested this, and shows you the examples, from simple changes to your pictures, to copying and pasting stock opener messages. If meeting women online appeals to you then you MUST check this out!

Here’s a sneak peak of what Action Jackson is teaching, and how effective his method of meeting women online is. It literally can take just 10 minutes to set the ball rolling with tons of beautiful women, and then watch the replies come in.

You’ll agree that with the statistics these days YOU SHOULD BE utilizing his method to your full advantage!

• MySpace is 100% free.
• 1 in 4 Americans is on MySpace.
• It has more than 110 million monthly active users.
• Over 300,000 new people sign up to MySpace every day.

Featured Course: Speed Seduction Home Study Course – by Ross Jeffries

I have been a long time friend of Ross, and have learnt a considerable amount from him on areas such as; Inner Game, Confidence, Powerful Seductive Language, and other amazing NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming Language) Techniques. Attention Men: Are You Ready To Discover The Absolute Best System For Getting You ANY Kind Of Women You Want, Just The Way You Want Them, Anytime, Anywhere, No Matter Your Age, Your Finances Or What You Look Like? Update: I’m not sure if Ross is still doing the free eBook, as I think that he is just sending out the information in a daily newsletter.. Click Here For The Speed Seduction Main Website!

Others To Consider: Window Shopping For Women

Updated: Here is another system for picking up women online. While they recently underwent a website makeover, and relaunched with the new domain of Meeting Women Online Now, I’m not as impressed compared to other books, and services out there. Yes, they have a flashy page, and a new web address, but their message to me is more about marketing than the others, and therefore less sincere. I’m sure that they also have some good information, but I have not personally reviewed any of their content, so I can’t recommend it at this time.

Summary of product ratings

Related posts:

1. PROOF..Attractive Girls Are Bitches
2. Pickup Artist Terms and Acronyms
3. Essential Seduction Book List

Getting to know each other

Without hesitation I would have to say that the most common question I’m asked when out and about is, “Can you just give me one tip.. one quick piece of advice on what to say?” In answer to this I have decided to give you not one but 10 quick tips! 

However, these aren’t openers and they’re not lines, and no they are not routines either.  Rather they provide some practical insight into connecting on a deeper level, thus keeping in the same vein as my last article (see “Losing my connection.. can you feel me now?”) 

Consider this as the foundation for ensuring that women will never flake on you again! You may recall that my comfort game is extremely strong, but it hasn’t always been that way for me. It’s something that I really had to work on. It’s something that improved as I matured emotionally, aided by my personal life experiences, and evolved through spending lots of time with women.

From now on when in comfort (after the initial attraction) and your mind goes blank on what to talk about, just remember the following 10 points:

1. When lost for words use Conversational Themes, such as talking about; Travel, The Government, The Economy, Music, Art, Books, Hobbies, Yours and Her Passions, Your Likes and Dislikes, or your Pet Peeves.

These are some topics that I actually like discussing. The key is to keep things interesting, and to keep the emotions engaged, while actually getting to know each other.

2. Talking with Passion, and being comfortable with your own self-expression. Women are extremely attracted to passionate men, who are comfortable expressing their feelings, views and thoughts on important issues, or on topics that have strong meaning for themselves. The key is to involve her, and not rant too much.

3. Demonstrate your Intelligence! I enjoy talking about complex issues that most people wouldn’t discuss on a first date. I talk about; politics, the government, economics, big pharma, engineering, and I vocalize my pet peeves.

Women love intelligent men, but they get turned off by boring men! The key is to keep things interesting, evoke her emotions, and keep it brief.

When a girl feels that she has learnt something about a complex issue, and that you reduced it down to a concept that she could understand without oversimplifying it, she feels more intelligent, she reveres you, and she feels connected. She will want to know you more.

4. Recognize and encourage the observation of Commonalities between you. These should be a big part of why you actually like her! Stop already with the, “No way, you like Pearl Jam, I love Pearl Jam.. high five!” Little superficial rapport builders like that can be fun and playful in the attraction phase, but later on it’s not enough. Guys that use such statements during comfort come off as transparent, insincere, untrustworthy, and just not real.

For example, I may be talking about travel when she chimes in and tells me about getting lost in Europe, and I tell her how we lost our car in Vegas when I was 17 and spent 3 hours in a cab combing the city for it.

Or, she talks about her favourite band, and the feeling she gets when watching them play live, and I tell her about my first concert that I snuck into, and how I’d never seen so many people in one place… and they were all unified, united… together in this moment.. it was amazing! (Hey a little NLP helps.. JDOG looks around mischievously.)

5. Understanding Her. This is where you must get out of your own head, and actually notice her. Notice when her eyes kind of sparkle and she gets excited about telling you something, or conversely when a subject makes her distant or melancholy.

Tell her something about herself that most people overlook. Find things to appreciate about her other than her big babalons, and let her know that it’s those qualities that you find so attractive about her. 

6. If you expect that a virtual stranger will instantly open up to you, then you are mistaken. That’s why Sharing and Going First is important. When you open up about something that has deeper meaning for you, whether happy or deeper sad emotions, she will to some extent experience those emotions with you. Remember those mirror neurons? She will feel connected to you, and she may then want to share something from her life, no doubt some of her deeper emotions.

7. Branching from topic to topic. You know when you are just hanging out with a bunch of guy friends, one conversation morphs into 5 different conversations as each of you chime in, sharing your thoughts and experiences. Be that comfortable here, as it’s better to talk about 20 seemingly unrelated topics than staying on 1 subject for an hour.

Afterwards you can always say, “Whoa, how did we start talking about this?” Then you can even backtrack the conversation, or just comment on how interesting she is.

8. Cut Negative and Boring Threads. Recognise when the conversation starts becoming too heavy, or boring, and change the subject. It is not necessary for the transition to make logical sense, just start talking about something completely different.

This can be done as simply as saying something like, “That reminds me I read this article about…” or “I was driving yesterday when such and such happened..” or “Hey get this..”

9. Call Backs. This is done frequently in comedy, where it is referred to as call back humour. For instance, if you gave her the nickname “little pirate” 5 minutes after you met her, then you can call her that 30 minutes later, “look little pirate.. blah.. blah..” Alternatively, you can do this in a serious manner by later referencing something she said.

Remember what I told you about the necessity of understanding her (see above,) well 5 or 10 minutes after she says something that is important to her bring it up again. That really shows you were listening, and were taking notice of her. For example, “You know when you were talking about music earlier.. it just seemed like it’s one of the most important parts of your life.”

10. Remember to maintain the sexual tension, and move things along. Use call back humour to teaser her a little, smell her neck, and tell her how great she smells, hold her hand, and let her play with your fingers.

Oh, and if she does play with your fingers you most likely can kiss her. If so, kiss her, and enjoy it but hold off on groping or getting too sexual too quickly, especially if you are still in the location where you met each other. Oh, and now’s the time to say, “Ya really turn me on wiv ya big babalons.” (Grin.)

Early on I was premeditated in the comfort phase, I was coming from a place of scarcity and insecurity with women, and was just trying to figure out what I was doing wrong. I experimented to attain an understanding of what worked. Sound familiar? Now, it’s just who I am, and now there is this natural flow of getting to know one another, albeit in a sexually excited way.

Developing your ability to genuinely connect with women will certainly put you ahead of the pack, and as I’ve stated before when a guy can connect on this level women feel compelled to see you again, and again, and.. well you get the picture.

If you like this breakdown then I would love to see your comments! You may also wish to visit my website www.askjdog.com where I post free video lessons, and answer questions. Cheers.. JDOG!

Related posts:

1. Losing my connection.. can you feel me now?
2. How To Be More Interesting

Making a real connection

I find myself on a train heading from Leeds to London, encapsulated in my own world via the perfect pairing of Shure noise isolating headphones, and iPhone. It’s been four years since I was last in my home country, and this has been an interesting trip. First off I had the most amazing teaching experience, when teaching and coaching with Dr. Paul Dobransky in London.

– Countryside blurs past the window to the soundtrack of U2. –

I just pulled out my copy of “Social Intelligence,” by Daniel Goleman. A must read for everyone by the way! This book is profound. It breaks down processes in the brain that, in some form or fashion, I’ve been teaching about for years. The more of it I read the better it gets. I will talk more about this book later.

Lately I’ve been thinking about how everyone seems to be teaching social skills these days, but very few of them teach men how to really be men. Where is the bootcamp on how to develop emotional maturity, or provide any kind of process to really connect with people in a genuine and honest way? It’s as if the seduction community is breeding a generation of used-car-salesman-seducers, or Salesman Seducers, or SADucers for short.. hmmm I like that, SADusers!

While I whole-heartedly agree that the outward social skills need to be taught, there is a strong need for a shift in focus to address the underlying causes of what makes some men lack confidence with women, and also what makes these ‘nice guys’ extremely poor boyfriend material. Perhaps I’m stretching here, but maybe.. just maybe.. some of these guys should be getting a teensy bit of advice on how to remedy their actual problems. Nah, I’m just having a moment of craziness.

Picking up women is a skill set; picking up women in a club is a very specific skill. Manipulating women into bed, a skill. Keeping quality women in your life, and mutually enjoying such relationships requires some personal growth. Becoming the man that women find naturally attractive, and being someone that they find themselves wanting to be around, is more about emotional growth in my opinion than anything else.

For want of a better term I’m going to suggest that people who focus purely on the external skills, as ‘masking’ their issues with women. Salesman Seducers are learning a skill set that simply masks their insecurities, and for some they can attract women that way. Can anyone else hear whispers of, “…buyer’s remorse… low self esteem… remorse..” somewhere in the back of their mind? No, yes, maybe? Hmm, perhaps it’s just me.

Do you think that such maskers are truly happy with themselves? Do they truly have high self-esteem? Do they have the emotional maturity to be able to connect with women on anything less than a superficial level?

Now you may be wondering if all JDOG’s going to do is rant, and perhaps you’re even saying to yourself, “hey JDOG teach me something already!” Which leads me back to talking about some elements of Daniel Goleman’s book, specifically, empathic communication.

Formula To Why Girls Flake

One serious problem I see with many of the guys chatting on message boards, and sarging with their lair counterparts is that they run game ‘at’ women. They are often not really present in the moment, with a genuine interest in getting to know her. Somewhere along the way, practicing relentlessly with their training wheels, they lost the plot.

With that in mind what I am about to share with you will undoubtedly help you become extremely attractive to the opposite sex. First some assumptions, yes I’m still an engineer at heart, and anything to be proven or tested scientifically has a set of assumptions in order for the argument to completely make sense.

1) If you are only interested in one night stands, then this most likely doesn’t apply to you, and if that is where your level of emotional maturity is at it’s absolutely fine. There is no judgment here on my part… ok maybe a little (grin.)

2) The game, so to speak, is won in comfort. You may have already heard this phrase. Well I personally think that this is where most of your effort should be placed. Granted you need to be able to ignite some initial attraction. God knows I spent far too long running high octane attraction game, opening every group of people several nights a week, for what seemed like an eternal night club stage show ala JDOG. Several shows a night, guaranteed to make you laugh, and service with a smile.. every time. Hoo-Ah!

3) The lady that you are interested in must feel some level of attraction for you, or intrigue, or interest in you BEFORE things progress into comfort. If this isn’t yet happening you still have some refining to do on your communication, amongst perhaps some other things. However, unless you fall into the one nightstand interest group (see assumption #1) then what I‘m about to teach you still applies.

4) Extremes are usually a bad thing. Please make no mistake here, I am certainly not suggesting that we all get so in touch with each other’s emotions that we behave like a bunch of women.. no offence intended to our female readers J.

Now, with the assumptions understood let’s continue. I see too many guys stuck in a never-ending cycle of trying to improve their attraction game, when they are already generating attraction. They fall short by never actually connecting with the girl in comfort. Dr. Paul calls this phase ‘friendship’ and perhaps that is a more appropriate term.

I certainly share a friendship with the women that I have sexual relationships with. Sure, sexual, intimate, and sometimes short-term friends maybe, but it is a friendship non-the-less.

Attraction usually takes place rather quickly, say during; an initial impression, first 10 minutes, first 30 minutes perhaps? Rarely is it a long drawn out epic-movie-type process that goes on for days, or weeks, months, or years. The real time spent together is AFTER she realizes that she is attracted to you in some way.

So what happens if you find yourself hanging out with the girl of your dreams? She was into you initially, and then it just seems like you are constantly fumbling around with ‘comfort routines’ and question games, and such, but there is an emptiness between you. A void. An emotional, and almost physical void. You feel it, and she certainly feels it.

I will tell you what happens next. She loses attraction. She loses interest. She doesn’t want to sleep with you. She doesn’t want to date you, and most likely she doesn’t need nor want to even see you again! Does that sound familiar?

Now, let’s run this scenario over again. Only this time we connect, we share ideas, emotions, and thoughts. This time you break away from the script, and actually have a genuine interest in her, and by that I don’t mean you sincerely like her boobs, although that does help. Emotions are exchanged whereby you experience and understand what it’s like to be her to some extent, and vice versa, all the while maintaining that sexual teasing, and playfulness. Do you understand the difference? Hello… can you feel me now?

We shouldn’t need a reference guide of neurological brain science to understand this. It’s just how our brains work. We want to be around people that are able to share their emotions with us in a healthy way, and people that make us feel good. We especially enjoy the company of those who are able to understand us, and experience our own emotions with us. We need something a little deeper than an initial feeling of attraction, which is actually pretty transient in the bigger scheme of things. We need something more substantial such as; comfort, friendship, trust, and understanding.

Shouldn’t she be thinking, “This guy gets me.. there’s something about him.. I felt like we’d known each for years… we had so much to talk about.. we..” She takes a breath, “We just had this chemistry.” She breathes out. I think she would remember you then. I know she would tell her friends about you, and when a girl talks about a guy in those terms her friends support her decisions.

Since the fairly recent discovery of Mirror Neurons in monkeys there has been much research into empathic neural circuitries. Studies have shown (now I sound like a commercial) that when observing another person’s emotional state that same emotion is activated within ourselves. There is a neural mechanism that maps what others are feeling onto our own nervous system. Read that last sentence again, it’s profound!

Now I’m just guessing here, but perhaps running game ‘at’ your ‘target’ past the first few minutes actually prevents this empathic communication from taking place. Which in turn limits your chances of getting to know each other, and reduces your chances of ever seeing each other again. Now that’s sad. Of course if you want women to think of you as false, shallow, manipulative, or insincere then by all means follow the path of the SADuser.

Are you a SADuser?

A glub monotone announcement bursts through the speaker system, “Attention to all the SADucers on this ride, we are arriving at your destination… please depart, taking all of your personal belongings with you… you have arrived… at FLAKE TOWN… population… YOU!”

I used to hate it when a girl flaked. I would meet a girl that I liked, get her number, and possibly even setup a bridge to see her again. I would go home thinking about her, and I would be happy that I met this cute girl. I might even be impressed with myself at how well everything went, how I did everything right, and how this girl now likes me! Then I would get all excited about seeing her, call her up, and…and… wait for it… and she wouldn’t be the same girl on the phone.

Her energy would be low, she sounded uninterested, she didn’t know who I was, and asked who was calling. Perhaps she would rush me off the phone because she was at work, or driving somewhere, or just plain busy, or was lost in a cave being hunted by wolves, and her phone was about to cut ou.. CLICK! Other times I would just get voicemail, and never hear back, even after I left too many messages, haha. How did I feel? Deflated.. Worthless.. Sad.

Somewhere along the way something clicked for me, and I discovered what makes girls flake, or more accurately what to do differently so that they rarely flake on me. In my situation I was generating attraction, and at the point in time when I met the girl she was really into me. However, we never really connected in comfort, or in ‘friendship’ after that.

Her initial interest would fade rapidly. In the brief time that would transpire from meeting me, to hearing from me again she would undoubtedly meet other guys that she was equally or more attracted to. Those guys may have been funnier, better looking, wealthier, had better game, or been more memorable for other reasons. What lost me those women was the lack of any kind of real and genuine connection.

So if you find that women are often flaking on you, then you might want to develop your ability to connect and build comfort with her, and you should be doing that right after the initial flirtatious attraction has taken place.

If you want me to go into detail on how to move things along in comfort, with specific examples then please post comments. If there is enough interest then I may elaborate on this topic.

In this article I hope that you have learnt to stop SADucing, and now realize that attraction takes place quickly, while comfort and friendship is a longer process that requires you to be a genuine human being. For many people becoming the type of man that women love being around is a process that takes time. To minimise girls flaking on you, she actually needs to get to know you on a deeper level, then she will feel compelled to see you again.

It takes time to get this stuff, but it is well worth it, and my philosophy on life is that anything of value takes effort, and most often persistence. If you enjoyed this article then please visit me at www.askjdog.com where I post free video lessons, and answer questions. Cheers.. JDOG!

Related posts:

1. 10 Great Comfort Tips
2. How To Be More Interesting

Mystery, The Mystery Method, and The Venusian Arts Revealed..

Mystery Method was a system developed to pickup women by the dating expert called Mystery, who’s real name is Erik Von Markovik.

Mystery spent years practicing how to meet women in night clubs, and social gatherings, as he had no success growing up. Mystery’s career path lead him to become a stage illusionist in Toronto, Canada, where he performed large stage shows, and smaller settings including the more intimate table magic performed at restaurants and corporate events.

“JDOG is an expert in picking up women
during the Day!” ~ Mystery

This was stated by Mystery on VH1’s The Pickup Artist when teaching the students Daytime Pickups. Mystery then deferred to JDOG for
completion of the lesson.

From those experiences, and from countless nights spent alone in clubs he developed an understanding of social dynamics, and group theory. Mystery eventually develop his experiences into a more cohesive method for seducing and attracting beautiful women.

Mystery is known more recently from co-hosting VH1’s The Pickup Artist, with JDOG, and Matador. Prior to which he was featured in Neil Strauss’ book, The Game. Many terms used in the seduction community can be attributed to Mystery, such as; Peacocking, IOI (Indicator of Interest), IOD (Indicator of Disinterest), LMR (Last Minute Resistance), using Routines, NEG’s (a back handed compliment or tease, used to disarm the “target”), and using Canned Material.

The Mystery Method M3 Model has been posted around the internet on dating and seduction message boards, where it describes Courtship as being divided in to 3 phases.

Attraction => Comfort => Seduction

Each phase is then divided into 3 sub-phases, with sets of tactics, or gambits used to move from phase to phase, whereby the ‘target’ (Mystery’s terminology for a woman that you are interested in) transitions form feelings of initial attraction through to a sexual relationship.

If you have read Mystery’s book titled, “The Venusian Arts Handbook,” then you will be familiar with the breakdown of the phases of courtship being:

A1 (Attract 1) – Opening
A2 (Attract 2) – Female to male interest (generating attraction)
A3 (Attract 3) – Male to female interest (qualify the target in order to show reasons for your attraction to her)

C1 (Comfort 1) – Comfort and Connection with your target
C2 (Comfort 2) – Trust with the girl you are seducing
C3 (Comfort 3) – Intimacy with the girl you are picking up

S1 (Seduction 1) – Arousal
S2 (Seduction 2) – LMR (Last Minute Resistance)
S3 (Seduction 3) – Sex

Has The Game Changed?

Since becoming popularized in the mass media you may be concerned, or wondering if such ‘tactics’ have become less effective. This very much appears to be the case, especially for guys who are just starting out.. with reports coming in of them being ‘busted’ in the field for using lines from The Pickup Artist, or ‘acting like one of those pickup artist guys’.

An increasing number of men are realizing that memorizing and learning “lines” and “routines” or “scripts” just isn’t them. They have also notice that meeting women that way rarely leads to happy relationships, because once the girl gets to know you the facade starts crumbling, and she will often lose attraction.

Many guys are fed up with dressing outrageously while trying to meet women using such types of club game. However, mystery method does work, but most men complain that they feel disingenuous, or manipulative, and the interesting thing is that they rarely seem to get the results that they wanted in their dating life.

This has caused more and more men to seek out a new way, a more natural and genuine way of attracting and keeping beautiful women in your life.

How can you become more naturally attractive?

Several dating coaches are leading the way in what is becoming a new men’s movement. These new teachings allow you as a man to become empowered and confident, while developing the choice you always wanted with women. In this new method men find themselves becoming more confident, and naturally more attractive to women, while maintaining a mutual respect with women, and those around you. In a word it’s simply a more ‘Authentic’ way of communicating.

Many people are raving about a guy called JDOG, because he focuses on getting guys to unlock their emotional blocks with women, and develop a natural confidence without having to rely on pickup lines, or gimmicks to get the girl.

You might be curious, or even excited to discover that JDOG teaches guys how to become naturally charismatic, and how to organically ignite sexual tension (what a woman feels as ‘Chemistry’) with the women around you. Real and genuine attraction leads to a far stronger possibility of keeping amazing women in your life, and giving you the type of sexual choice you always wanted.

If reading this makes sense to you, then realize that JDOG has taught 1000’s of men, and now you can get a glimpse of some of these exciting lessons absolutely free.

You can watch JDOG’s free VIDEO advice below:

Inside you’re going to learn…

• How to create chemistry.. that Magical Moment that she feels as CHEMISTRY.
• Exactly how to approach a woman you are attracted to, and get the right kind of flirtatious conversation started.
• Body Language Basics to trigger a woman’s attraction mechanisms.
• When and how to kiss her.. JDOG’s techniques that NEVER fail.
• Eliminating fear and risk of rejection!
• ..and get your questions answered by JDOG!

Just use your first name and a valid email – then click the “Submit” button to enter. All information kept 100% confidential. Allow the next page a few seconds to load. We take your privacy very seriously. You can read our entire privacy policy here.

Cheers,
Justin (better known as “JDOG”)

Related posts:

1. Pickup Artist Terms and Acronyms
2. Interesting Video On Being Beautiful

Here is a list of common PUA (Pickup Artist) terms, as used on message boards online over the last several years, where men talk about how to pickup women. Meanings and originator are also list where the information was available.

Related posts:

1. PROOF..Attractive Girls Are Bitches
2. Seduction eBook Recommendations
3. Interesting Video On Being Beautiful